Mental Prisons: Part 1 - Build the Infrastructure to Escape

We all know that dieting is pretty darn hard. It requires us to resist some of the things that we are hardwired to want (I don't know about you, but I am pretty sure I was born craving Krispy Kreme donuts and extra dark russet potato chips). Besides naturally craving food that is high in calories (to help get us through those long winters when it might be too cold to grow our Krispy Kreme donuts and potato chips!), we form our initial eating habits when we are very young and easily influenced. It can be very difficult to change those habits, even if you know you should, and really want to change them.  We all have examples of habits we'd like to shed and have not been able to.  I believe that a lot of the difficulty can come from not really believing we can really do it.  If a goal is not in your world view (the fundamental cognitive orientation of an individual or society encompassing the entirety of the individual or society's knowledge and point-of-view, including natural philosophy), you probably don't have a clear vision of how to accomplish the goal and most importantly, the belief in yourself that you can succeed.  And by succeed I mean more than initial success.  I mean succeed all the way through the inevitable ups and downs of trying to accomplish that goal.  I refer to this state as being in a mental prison.  Most of us really do hold the key, or keys to that prison but they can be hard to find. Sometimes we need multiple keys because the doors are double or triple locked. In addition to difficultly finding the keys the path out of the prison is frequently not clear and mired with obstacles.  

The help you get by setting goals that are within your world view does not only apply to weight loss.  I see examples of this in many aspects of life, including career choice.  Kids who grow up around adults who are doctors or lawyers are more likely to aspire to go to medical school or law school.  It's in their world view.  Many children in private schools come from families whose parents have been successful in their careers.  It's catching, and their children believe they too can be successful, and after private school they frequently go to good colleges, graduate school or start a business.  And if many of their peers aspire to higher education, it can be in the "world view" of other kids in the school?  But if it is not in your world view to see that you can get from here to there you will be less likely to believe you can really do it. 

One reason that it can be hard to change your world view is that accomplishing most worthwhile goals takes many many years.  There is no weekend course for medical school or law school.  Even getting admitted to medical school requires a lot discipline, good behavior, and abstaining from other things (that might be more enjoyable) for many years.  Once admitted to medical school, it takes many more years of hard work.  But at least in medical school or any graduate program, you are surrounded with like minded folks to compare yourself to, so if you do your part, you can come to believe that you can complete your goal.  You can even botch a few tests and still succeed overall if you recover from a few bad grades, by studying harder, and keeping your eye on the ball.  Similar to this, if a person has decided to lose weight, gotten to their goal weight, and stayed there for a while, they did not get there without set-backs and lapses.  Like a bad grade every now and then, set-backs happen.  The real key to getting to and staying where you want to be is not to let them throw you off course.  As a student, if you have a bad teacher who gives you an unfair test, you can blame the bad grade on the teacher.  However, with weight loss there is no one to blame but yourself, therefore recovering from a set back is all on you.  So, if you don't really believe you can accomplish your goal, it is very easy to give up.  

It can be so hard that though I believe that almost any adult is capable of making dietary changes I am usually surprised when I see them do it. I believe they can, but I am not sure they do.  And you know what? Life is short and there are lots of important and worthy things to focus on. Changing eating habits and mindsets, and powering through lapses, requires focus.  I truly believe people should focus on what is important to them at the time. If losing weight is not a priority at the moment, I say don't sweat it. Something else important is probably a priority to you now so focus on that. There is always time to lose weight.

If you feel you might be ready to change your eating habits, build up an infrastructure.  The primary key to success with long term goals is to learn how to recover from the lapses.  An infrastructure and support group can help you get back on the right path when you trip up or lapse.  How can you do this?

1. Find a support group so you surround yourself with like-minded folks.  It's not for everyone, but it is certainly helpful for many.  Weight Watchers, fitness clubs, or classes and programs at the YMCA work for many.  I know my mom used to come and go at Weight Watchers.  Apparently a million + folks agree with her.  She went when she needed it, and took a break when she didn't.  I see friends and neighbors do the same thing with Weight Watchers, fitness clubs and the YMCA. Our local YMCA has programs that folks can sign up to do, such as a team competition program designed after the Biggest Loser.  Classes at fitness programs can be motivating and give you the chance to bond with like-minded folks. 

2.  Sign up to some forums on the internet.  I had fun with some South Beach diet forums when I tried the South Beach diet.  As with fitness clubs you can bond with folks who have similar weight loss goals, and support one another.  You can set up regular weekly roll calls giving folks and opportunity to check in.  You can celebrate victories and offer support and encouragement when goals are not achieved.  You can learn about diet and exercise tips, and offer your own.  The more you hear about success from ordinary folks, the more you'll believe you can do it too.  You can also find some strength if you can inspire others with your own tips and tricks.

3.  Find some blogs that can provide inspiration.  Usually it takes just a few minutes to read a blog post, and you may be able to hear from someone who has been through the school of hard knocks and learned a thing or two.  From those blogs, you will see that they will usually link to their favorite blogs.  Occasionally I enjoy Mark's Daily Apple.  I am definitely not as hard core-low carb as he and many of his readers.  But I can always get a tip or trick, a recipe (coconut encrusted chicken) or some inspiration by reading success stories.  Amazon's Al Dente can be a fun stop for for recipes, cooking tools, and cooking tips, especially around the holidays.  Jimmy Moore, Living La Vida Low-Carb is very supportive, positive, and full of tips and tricks.  The Fit Bottomed Girls are a lot of fun!  FuturePundit looks to the future on many topics including nutritional health.

4.  Watch the Biggest Loser for inspiration.  You get to know the competitors, and they all have a story, and a strong desire to change their eating habits.  Every week these folks overcome new challenges and rise to new heights, inspiring their coaches, their team mates and Americans who are watching.  It is impossible not to be happy for and inspired by these folks.

5.  Realize that recovering from lapses is even more important than starting.  Learn from your lapses and you will become stronger.  Incorporate your vision of how to accomplish your goal into your world view and you will believe you can accomplish your goals and break free from that mental prison.  

6.  Finally, believe in yourself.  Trust your instincts about what works for you, regardless of what the "experts" say.